Gay SEX tips

October 24, 2007


For those of you familiar with about.com they have “how to” and Q&A on pretty much every topic in the world. They have a particularly elaborate “Lesbian Life” section. I highly recommend checking it out: http://lesbianlife.about.com/.

There are articles on all sorts of topics including: Top Lesbian Halloween Costumes, Planning Lesbian Weddings, and Good Fall Dates

But what are always the funniest articles are the sexual “how to” articles, they range from normal girl-girl sexing, to bring toys into the bedroom, to all out fisting (eek!). But what I was looking for was just a list of tips, since I have posted lots of straight sex tips. Figured it was about time to rep the lezzies. What I found was a list of first time girl sexing tips. I think it is funny how predictable women are. The tips relate to typical women things like comfort, communication, and emotional well being. But they do make sense and I agree with the tips, although I would have added “keep it simple” and “think about what you like”.

Here are the about.com top ten tips (lesbians):

1. Get to know your own body.

2. Go sober.

3. Go Safe.

4. Fantasize.

5. Leave the toys in the drawer.

6. Relax.

7. Communicate.

8. Have realistic expectations.

To contrast I decided to look up tips for gay man first time sex. To my shock aside from references in coming out articles, there was a general lack of gay male first time sex articles. (Although there was an abundance of first time articles about fisting, kink, and threesomes). I don’t believe that all gay men are hoes, I personally know the world’s oldest gay virgin, and so I decided the nice gay boys need a list of their own.

So here are my tips for your first time (gay guys):

  1. Tell the other person it is your first time
  2. Bring SEVERAL condoms, you never know what is gonna happen
  3. DO NOT try to imitate porn
  4. Try to relax (I suggest thinking about what’s on tv if you start to get nervous)
  5. If you’re feeling unsure about it, wait, there will always be willing and able guys out there
  6. Turn the lights out!
  7. If you have crusty feet, keep your socks on
  8. Do not assume he loves you or will even call you again if you haven’t been dating for a while
  9. Be willing to laugh (not at the other person) if something doesn’t work. Sex is funny, it’s part of life.
  10. Have fun, and don’t forget to tell your fag hag the details!

Breast Cancer Quotes

October 6, 2007

I figured I would put these up in honor of Breast Cancer awareness month. I keep seeing the pink ribbons everywhere and we are doing a lot at school for raising money for and awareness of cancer. Also we just did an interesting section of immunology in my infectious disease management class on potential treatments. It was more comprehensive than many schools would include, because it dared to talk about treatments other than chemo, radiation, and surgery. I think the teachers willingness to expose us to the latest science even if the scientific community is still debating it is one of the most positive things about Temple. Because more than likely during the course of our careers these new methods will be used in many places, so while it is important to know the standard treatments it is also important to be aware of new developments. http://www.unitedforpink.com/ has many interesting/inspiring stories, medical information, and support forums for Breast Cancer. And I was reading it today and it featured an article of quotes from survivors from all over the country.

Olga Smirnova from Latvia — Be brave, optimistic and never lose your sense of humour. Even bad things sometimes turn into advantages in our life.

Yoko Kameda from Japan — Accept and go through it! Everything is a gift.

Isabelle Traeger from Finland — There is always hope and if hope is trying to leave you, there is always a place for miracles.

Maret Maasalu from Estonia — Believe in yourself.

Olena Iurchenko from Ukraine — Life is beautiful. The greatest joy and value in any woman’s life.

Andrea Doreen Stuart from the United Kingdom — Routine mammograms work!

Ingrid Valles Po from United Arab Emirates — Breast cancer is curable! Enjoy UR Life

Erika Simonic from South Africa — The only thing I have lost is my breast. I have gained: Friends, Love, Opportunities and Weight!!

Nor Azah Adnan from Malaysia — Nothing is more important in life than life itself.

Egle Melinauskiene from Lithuania — I love all women from all the world. With the best wishes.

Kim Whiting from Australia — Ladies are like butterflies. So spread your wings and fly, fly, fly.


Q&A with a sex genius/life expert

October 6, 2007

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I love the Men’s Health site. While most of the things I have come across are targeted at men about women, I think they still funny/worthwhile. They have a section of ask the Sex Professor (here) and a section about asking Jimmy The Bartender (here), both provide quality answers to readers questions. But what makes reading the questions so enjoyable is sometimes the readers ask the weirdest/grossest/funniest/or most obvious questions. The experts take them in stride and provide helpful, well phrased answers. On the actual site the Sex Expert answers hundreds of questions about every range of sexuality, including positions, techniques, history, science, and relationship advice. Jimmy The Bartender gives out general life advice, mainly related to relationships but also about friendship, parenting, and dealing with co workers. He gives surprisingly good answers and deals with some serious problems like alcoholism and death. To give you a sampling, I have listed a question with a funny/obvious answer, a weird question, a TMI question, a medicine question and a good to know anatomical question. To give you a heads up, this artice is for adults. They talk about naughty bits.

Q: My girlfriend knows that I bought her an engagement ring, and ever since, she’s been acting bitchy. Is she going to say no?

Jimmy The Bartender® Answers:
Other night, taking the subway home, I’m waiting on the platform. I’m waiting, and waiting. Half an hour, then 40 minutes, and I think, I could’ve walked home by this time. Was I annoyed? Yes. But I also knew that it was a mistake to leave, because I knew it was going to come eventually, and I really wanted to ride that train. I think your girlfriend feels the same way. Women are gentle creatures. I think if she were going to say no, she would’ve left by now to spare you some embarrassment. My guess is that she’s just antsy. She wants you to pull up, open the doors, and invite her along for a great ride.

Q: Why do wet dreams stop? How can I get them back?Ask the Sex Professor Answers:
Although wet dreams are most common during puberty, for some they continue into adulthood. Dry spells (times of little or no masturbation or sex) can result in wet dreams, so you may need to choose between sleeping and waking orgasms. Wet dreams can also be triggered by friction or a full bladder. If you don’t mind risking a midnight bathroom run, try drinking water before bed to see if your dreams become hyperrealistic.
Q: Ever since my girlfriend started taking birth-control pills, she seems to want sex less often. Are they related?

Jimmy The Bartender® Answers:
Unfortunately, yes. The estrogen contained in most birth-control pills may lower levels of free testosterone, which is associated with libido. Others suggest that the blame may be misplaced, as sexual frequency tends to decline in long-term relationships anyway, Pill or no Pill. Desire and interest may also be influenced by stress, fatigue, depression, medications, and relationship issues. So, if she’s willing, attack the problem on several fronts. Ask about lower-estrogen pills, hit the gym, and consider therapy appointments with either a psychologist or a sex therapist.
Q: I’m hung like a blimp. Even jumbo condoms sometimes break. How can I have safer sex if the condoms I’ve tried don’t work?

Jimmy The Bartender® Answers:
Poor guy. Sometimes a kielbasa can be a curse. Condoms like Lifestyles XL, Trojan Magnum, and Durex XXL give most men the breathing room they need; applying a water- or silicone-based lubricant to the outside (making sure to reapply during particularly long or vigorous bouts of sex) can further reduce friction and breakage risk. If that doesn’t work, a more tailored option is TheyFit condoms, which come in 55 sizes. Download a Fit Kit fromwww.condomania.com.
Q: My girlfriend has extremely hot friends, and we’re going on a beach trip. I’m worried about getting an erection. Is there anything I can do to control it?

Ask the Sex Professor Answers:
It’s best to have a multipronged approach: baggy swim trunks, dips in cool water, Jedi mind tricks (think about work), and a preregistered excuse: Tell your girlfriend you’re worried about driftwood because you can’t stop thinking about how hot she looks in a swimsuit.
Q: My girlfriend says her breasts are too big to have sensitive nipples. Can this be true?

Ask the Sex Professor Answers:
Sure. Larger breasts (C or D cups) are generally less sensitive than smaller ones. It’s thought that there’s some nerve-fiber damage associated with stretched skin and connective tissue. But don’t despair. Though the nipple and areola–which many men focus on–are low on sensitivity, the top of the breast is highly sensitive. Explore her northern hemispheres or, if she’s game, apply flavored, menthol-infused, sensitivity-boosting Bosom Buddy (pureromance.com) to her nipples and areolas. But if she’s not aroused by breast play, move on. You have an entire body to savor.


Perfect Date Tips for the Clueless

October 5, 2007

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This is a list of 20 tips to the perfect date, they are geared at the first date. I would think almost all of them are common sense, but what I am gathering about men is that they know little to nothing. Sorry boys. But boys want sex and girls want sex with a good relationship so you are looking for different things on a first date. Here you go:

By: Samantha Daniels (LINK)

1. It’s okay to suggest a drink instead of dinner for a first date. She dreads a boring four-course ordeal, too.

2. Call her by early evening on Monday to confirm a Tuesday get-together. (Weekends aren’t for first dates.)

3. Leave your home and work numbers. No home number and she’ll assume you have a wife or girlfriend.

4. If you want to keep the plans a surprise, at least clue her in as to what to wear. You do not want an overdressed, overstressed woman navigating the Talladega pits in high heels

5. Yes, she’ll notice if the date location you’ve chosen is conveniently around the block from your place.

6. Don’t assume that just because you’re out with a beautiful woman, she knows how pretty she looks — she wants to hear it from you.

7. Ask if she’s too cold or too warm, and if changing the temperature is in your power, fix it.

8. Men judge women according to whether they can picture having sex with them; women judge men by whether they can imagine kissing them. White teeth, fresh breath, and unchapped lips make her more apt to pucker up.

9. Do not ask her, “So, what kind of music do you like?” The last 25 guys asked that. Be original.

10. She loves when you insist on ordering dessert. Sharing = extra sexy.

11. Tip well: Grab the check, mentally divide the bill by 10, double that number, and throw down the tip. Do it quickly but casually. Believe me, she’ll be watching.

12. If she touches your arm, she’s interested; if she touches your leg, she’s interested tonight.

13. When in doubt, hold her hand.

14. Very small protective gestures go a long way and show her you’re a gentleman: Offer your arm as she’s stepping from a curb, direct her away from shards of broken glass aka Say Anything. She’ll notice if you wait until she’s safely in her car or house before you leave. Wait the extra 90 seconds, and next time you might be going in with her.

15. She expects you to know her eye color after the first date.

16. Women need momentum — without it, they lose interest or wonder if you have. Momentum = a minimum of one date a week, plus a couple of phone calls in between.

17. She knows that when you invite her over for a homemade meal or to watch a movie, it’s code for “tonight is hook-up night.” Don’t play this card any earlier than date three.

18. A Friday or Saturday night is required by date four. Otherwise, she’ll wonder who else you’re seeing.

19. Rule of Groping: If anything happens that couldn’t be shown on prime-time TV, call her the next day. Otherwise, she’ll feel cheap and used.

20. Don’t say, “I’ll call you,” if you have no intention to. She’d prefer that you say nothing at all.

Good luck in life and love. The bold ones are the ones that would critical on a date with me.


21 Things Men Need to Know about Women

October 5, 2007

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    I came across a list of 50 things women wished men knew (LINK). These are the ones I personally find true. I love how some are incredibly stereotypical of women and some I think men would have no clue about. But in both situations I think they generally hold true. Obviously not all women are as insecure as some of the list would suggest, but honestly a lot of us are. 

    As always I think many of the “things women wish men knew” is translatable to my gay and lesbian readers.  For lesbians you would think both know everything on the list and would be careful not to hurt each others feelings as  much as straight couples, or that the communication would be somehow better.  But I can tell you first hand that I have done things counter to the list which have gotten me in trouble, and Christina has also not taken the extra second to think where I might be coming from before she says something.  For gay men, you are practically women anyway, just kidding, sorta.  But my gay boys out there, you know you can be sensitive about looks and insecure about if your partner is still into you too.

1. Saying “I love you” immediately before, during, or following sex doesn’t count.

5. I’m convinced I’m pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.

6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.

9. I’m terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.

13. I’m scared of losing my independence.

15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.

16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I’m not. (See directly above.)

20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.

26. If you ask me out directly, I will say yes.

29. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.

31. Women get urinary-tract infections easily, so watch (and wash) your fingers.

33. You’re sexy when you’re shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.

34. I need to hear how you feel about me. Often. Tell me now.

35. Surprises, especially gifts for moi = more loving.

36. I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you–and for you to recognize this.

44. I like porn.

45. I love holding your bum in the palms of my hands.

46. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public.

47. It’s cheating as soon as you’re doing something with her that you wouldn’t want me to see, hear, read…

48. For the record: I’d rather you break up with me than cheat.

49. I remember everything about our relationship.

 

 


Hot Gay Best Friend Sex

October 4, 2007


I got this article from a seedy website. I would link to it, but there are pretty much naked people all over and I don’t want to advertise porn. But I think it actually has some valuable advice for those trying to stage a hook up with their best friends. The advice holds somewhat true for straight and lesbian couples as well, but as the article was target for gay men, I left in the pronouns.

There’s something about best friends. You love them, you share everything with them, but you don’t really want to have hot gay sex. Except maybe once. We’re only human. We’re not made of stone. Emotions can have a habit of over-spilling. And this is one occasion when it’s arguable great first time sex with a ‘new’ partner can happen while quite drunk.

These are the rules:

1. Right now, never mind tomorrow morning or earlier this evening, do you both want to have sex? Or is it just you? Or is it just him? If either of the latter two options applies, stick to the beers until neither of you is any longer capable – You can just drool on to each other about love, like straight friends. If, on the other hand, you really are both up for it, then it could be time for some fun.

2. Do you or does he have a boyfriend? To whom are you or he committed? If there is a one-on-one boyfriend in the background, bear in mind that if you do have sex now you won’t be seeing each other again for about six months – and then it will be boyfriend-chaperoned and distinctly frosty.

3. Do either of you really want a relationship with the other person – and being best friends has been the second best alternative to that? If so, it could be sex will shake it out of your system, or it could be Fatal Attraction time. Up to you.

4. Are you very good at keeping sex and love conceptually separate? Sex and friendship can coexist perfectly well, but if you associate sex with intimate love and commitment you are heading for trouble.

5. Are you going to learn something about your best friend you’d rather you didn’t know? In terms of ‘kink’ and performative preferences, it could be best to have lots of talk about sex beforehand. Like you haven’t.

6. To sum up: will sex be great fun and a way of sharing friendship and bonding, or is it a very big deal? If the latter, press ‘play’ on the next DVD.

7. And finally: Don’t fondle your friend in the morning. That was last night; this is now.

Keep in mind hooking up with your best friend, can be the start of the best relationship of your life or the end of one of the best relationships in your life. But in most cases it will fall in between. Good luck in life and love.


Sex Tips

October 3, 2007

I got the message. My two previous sex posts (homemade porn tips, and tips from porn for good girls) were two of my most popular posts ever.

You want sex. Nay, you need sex. Well always looking to please my readers, who are apparently always looking to please someone in their life, I’ve decided to post a more extensive sex tip article. Today I am taking notes from bible of sex tips, Cosmo. Cosmo split the tips into categories: Get Him Riled Up, Feisty Foreplay, Getting it On, His Down There Domain, and Kink it Up. They are tips men sent in for women. Now from the multitude of tips found within their website, I’ve tried to pick what I found the best.

This selection was based on four factors:

  1. Did I feel it was translatable to my gay and lesbian audience well? (I would never forget you kids)
  2. Would I personally find the item sexy or enjoyable?
  3. Did it make sense?
  4. Was it clean enough that I wouldn’t feel bad if kids stumbled on here, but dirty enough to entice my adult readers?

Before you continue, these are tips for adults. For my more adventurous adult readers check out the actual site (Cosmo Article) they have the really juicy tips, with the specifics of what to put where and how to…..

Get Him Riled Up (or Her)

“When I lean in to kiss you, hold the back of my head gently in your hand. It’s tender yet sexy.” – Donny, 34

“The night after I got a big promotion my girlfriend said she was going to give me only oral sex all night.” –Ken, 32.

“If we’re somewhere semi-public and can’t go at each other, press your hips against mine.” –Henry, 25

Feisty Foreplay

“Do what my first girl did: Moan my name while I pleasure you.” –Eddie, 28.

“My current girlfriend treated me to a ‘bed dance’: she had me lie on my back while she slowly rubbed herself along my chest, stomach…” –Arlo, 27

“My girl pretended not to want to kiss me. I had to use my tongue to pry her mouth open passionately.” –Ron, 25

Getting It on

(Most of the tips were too graphic, I picked two tame ones)

“Tell me to get undressed but to keep my tie on. Pull on it to bring me closer to you.” –Ted, 31.

“When you’re near the point of no return, whisper four letter words into my ears –the really dirty ones.” –Fred, 23.

Down There Domain

(too graphic and really only applicable to men)

Kink It Up

“My fiancé will blindfold me and rub her body across my face. I can only use my mouth and tongue to identify what I’m feeling” –Carter, 29.

“One night, my girlfriend stopped the action and pointed to the camera she’d set up in the corner.” –Justine, 21

“My ex would me at local dive bars and pull me into the restroom for raunchy, against-the wall sex.” –Max 21.

“Treat your guy to sex under water. With your bodies feeling so weightless…” –Mark, 29

“Morning sex please” –Charlie, 26

“While we’re driving alone on a back road, ask me to pull over and then jump into my lap. You’ll be fulfilling my teenage fantasy of getting busy in my care.” –Jason, 34.